Serendipity

A magazine suggested that Brida was a romantic read, that it speaks about Soulmates, so I made a note in my mobile phone to buy this.  After sometime, I got a text from my Ate Rose if I read Paulo Coelho books.  I said yes.  She told me she’ll be giving me a couple of his books, which she hopes I have not read yet.  Surprise, surprise, Brida was one of them.

As with other Coelho books, Brida is philosophical, insightful, spiritual and magical.  It has an occult-at-the-backdrop-of-modern-reality kind of feel.  I particularly appreciate the merging of predominantly conceived as paganistic ideas with that of Christianity. 

This book does not speak about Soulmates alone; however, it is a concept that acts as a definitive ancillary.  The book even gave a clue on how you will know your Soulmate.  Interesting, huh? It even said that finding more than one Soulmate in a lifetime will only result to suffering and broken hearts.  The book explains the concept of having more than one Soulmate in a lifetime fairly well.  In the many insights it brings forth about Soulmates, what i find most bittersweet is the idea that meeting a Soulmate may only mean learning a very important lesson, a lesson that will free a person from that which slaves; thereby allowing movement to a new stage in life.  In such a case, your Soulmate is not lost because it was never yours. 

Brida, for me, is about a search for one’s path, one’s self, even.  Finding one’s Soulmate is part of this search.  

I read somewhere before, that the books that find our way are the books we are meant to be acquainted with, for whatever reason there is.  Apparently, I am meant to meet Brida.

I am searching now..According to the book, every woman can make use of the Four Rings of Revelation in communing with the Universe: Virgin, Martyr, Saint and Witch.  I can’t seem to see myself as a Martyr, nor a Saint.  That leaves two other choices…

I have heard it said that “time heals all wounds.”  I have also heard it said that “a person has truly moved on from a previous love only when there is a new love.”

So which is the great healer, then, time or love?

And I Love You So (yes, the movie that stars Bea Alonzo, Sam Milby and Derek Ramsay) tells us that both Time and Love are healers.  However, Time has to do the healing first.  It cures during the phase wherein a broken heart is akin to an Emergency Room case — blood all over, open wounds, broken bones, cries of pain.  It is Love that completes the whole healing process.  Love may be present at the Emergency Room, during treatment at the Infirmary, or even at the height of surgery, but its presence is full force during recovery. Love awashes and renews and rejuvenates after Time has been able to clean, stitch and medicate.

I believe there is no other way.  Time and love works hand-in-hand, yes, but each is needed more on certain phases of healing.  A new love works at its best only when time was able to do its magic.

P.S. I love this film.  Bea, Sam and Derek are at their finest.  I have seen all of Bea’s movies (I am a John Lloyd-Bea fan), and in And I Love You So, she is at her best (BTW, Bea-Sam…knee-wobblling hot!).

My self-imposed sabbatical celebrates its first monthsary tomorrow.  The first month flew by so fast.  When I was working, I usually felt that I am painstakingly pulling at the hands of time for the working day to end.  Ang haba-haba ng mga araw, ang ikli-ikli ng mga gabi. Now, I enjoy every single day.  I am having a lot of fun that it scares me.  Hahaha.

I still don’t know how long I will be in sabbatical.  My thoughts are filled with questions and ideas on what I really want to do. However, I am not motivated enough to start with them.  I am unfazed by the extent of the work involved or the change that will occur.  My concerns lie in the rightness of the decision. 

A special someone suggested that I take a break from digging into myself (punctuated by an action similar to a puppy playing with water, read: nagkakawkaw), and stare into its depth instead.  Maybe I should do just that.  Maybe the calmness would make me realize my purpose.  I wish God will just take me by the hand and tell me, in no uncertain terms, that this is where He wants me to be.

How can I begin to describe what this book made me feel…and realized.

I cried while I was reading this.  For people who know me, that statement would not count for much since I cry on the slightest hint of drama in comedy films and cartoons.  However, the crying that I did while reading this book falls under the crying that I do when I am soul-searching.

Yes, this book is meant for reflection.  To get its full effect, I think, readers should be, at the least, open to the concepts and thoughts such a material provide. 

The story answered something in the core of my searching soul.  It reminded me of previously held beliefs, beliefs that got lost in the daily struggles of finding who I really am and what I really want to do.  It awakened in me the possibility of new realizations, those that just might be what I need in order to get to where I should be.

This book is so full that I think it has the ability to give something unique to each reader, something that each reader really needs. 

Amidst the reacquainted beliefs and potential realizations, the book speaks of a truth that I held dear as well:  God wants nothing less for us than to know that we live loved to the point that He uses for good even the most painful of experiences.

I first learned about quarter life crisis when I was starting on the working-me.  I read about it through an email and instantly felt like I was undergoing the exact thing, then.  I wonder, however, if I can undergo such twice in a decade.  The quarter life span is said to be from early twenties to early thirties.  I guess, I am, indeed, having a quarter life crisis, again.

Since I got back from our KL trip, I have found myself always wondering If I still want to do what I am currently doing for the next three (3) years.  I find myself, as I drive to work, thinking of various scenarios for the future me, seeking what will make me feel…Me.  I guess, leaving a comfort zone made me realize I can leave more such zones.

I remember having a dream about two (2) pillows during those long months when i was deciding if I should leave GSIS or not.  In my dream, I am with a group of people in some sort of a theme park.  I was carrying two (2) white and very soft pillows as I wait my turn to get into this adventure house.  I carried these two (2) soft pillows as I move from one seat to another, awaiting my turn; I carried them until I got in the house, itself.  There was a place in the house where I have to climb a hanging wooden stairs in order to reach the window that will lead me to the sturdy and safe part of the house.  I remember thinking to myself, in my dream, if I can do it.  I remember climbing the stairs, reaching the window, getting into the safe part of the house, without the two (2) pillows….

I thought, then, that my dream was telling me that it is not so bad, so scary to leave my comfort zone.  It was, then, that I seriously considered leaving GSIS.  I wonder now, however, if the two (2) pillows signify two (2) comfort zones — my then current employer and my career. 

I have only thought about this dream again because of what I’ve been thinking these days.  I’ve been having a prevalent feeling of wanting to do something else, of steering my life elsewhere.  I have been trying to recall the many dreams that I had when I was younger, hoping to realize what I really want to do with my life.

Lately, I am able to see myself doing something else and be actually excited about getting and being there.  I wonder if that course of path is really what I want or it is just my thirst for knowledge talking…

I intend to find out very soon, though. Wish me luck!

I just recently received the CD of our KL-SG trip (Nov. 25 to Nov. 30, 2008) from Vive, our designated budget officer, tour operator and taga-dala ng camera (It is tiring to pose for more than one cam when you are in a group, how much more if there were just three of you. Hehe).  I usually look at our pictures when I am stressed at work or feeling kinda down.  The pics are great uppers.

I enjoyed the local food that we tried.  I enjoyed our commuting experience, including the cab rides that we took (except the one that brought us to the airport for our departure — the cab arrived late from the scheduled pick up time and the driver stopped a lot to check the car engine that we feared we will not reach our flight on time), which we try to avoid during visits to other countries since it will be an unnecessary expense .  Their Hop On Hop Off tour bus concept is quite convenient for tourists.  It was, also, the only bus ride that we took during our stay since we did not try to understand how their bus transportation routes work (we were big on lrt/mrt rides during our stay).  Of course, we did some shopping there.  We went to Pavilion and Suria KLCC during their weekend sale.  It was so fun, although tiring, to buy clothes and gifts and to just simply look around in and take pictures of some high end stores. The Petronas Twin Towers is very beautiful at night and Genting Highlands is such a cold and cool place.  It was a pity we were not able to experience any indoor or outdoor rides (pity for my companions, I am ok about it, though. Teehee.)  The cable car ride that we took was really long and high.  It was also here that we bought a very good-tasting coffee, its exact brand name, Malaysian Coffee or something, I fail to recall at this moment (sa sarap, yung name nung coffee ang nakalimuan ko.herher).  Oh, yeah, we had a getting lost experience there, too.

Amongst the many things that we did there, I would say that what I liked most about this travel, what I enjoyed most during the visit, what made it a Peter Pan happy thought kind of memory is the company I was with during the visit. =))

To my dearest Vive and Ca: Saan tayo this year?

Among the three (3) Asian countries I have visited so far, this one I love the best.  I especially salute their public tranportation system.  They have this one prepaid public transportation card, called E-Z Link, which can be used in paying for MRT and bus rides, and be credited with an additional fixed amount when necessary.  This is the city one can get lost in, literally (this is based on my two visits to this country — harhar). 

It is indeed a safe and clean city…a place that is very friendly to tourists, where one can get lost and be found easily, where one can go back to somewhere familiar after mistakenly getting to somewhere strange…(Oh, this we so know!)

It is just that, nothing will ever beat the “naturalness” of the places to visit in our very own country.  This is something that should make us take better care of our natural resources and environment — not solely because we need the money that our tourism indsutry could rake in, but because, we are simply grateful for the beauty that was given to us, grateful for something not modern, but timeless…

Yes, this series consumed some of my waking moments during my 2 week vacation.  I am done with seasons 1 to 3, and because of my being impatient, I have scouted spoilers, episode guides and you tube uploaded videos on the season 4 episodes already.

My questions about and need on the storyline are, I guess, to be answered greatly by Season 4.  I am particulary very pleased about two facts that I have gathered on this Season:

(1) Sam’s powers will finally be showcased. I have been waiting…and waiting..and waiting…for what he can really do, and why there has been so many bruhaha about him since Season 2.  Finally, I will see some more insteresting stuff about what he can do; and,

(2)  For something that predominantly plots about demons, the series is yet to introduce the religious and much accepted positive counterpart of such a concept — God or a higher omnipotent Being.  Finally, the series has such aspect in its plot now. 

These two make me want to get hold of a complete Season 4 episodes NOW.  However, i have to exercise patience now.  Yes, after satisfying ny curiousity on what the season is offering through the world wibe web , I can now put on hold my need to watch the new season continuously and will now show my high level of emotional quotient.

…As I twiddle my thumbs….

I took my first step
On that black and white kitchen floor
I sometimes wonder if that house
Is even there, anymore
I had my first glimpse of love
When I was five
I watched two people split apart
But still the three of us survived

I’ve seen the best
I’ve seen the worst
I wouldn’t change what I’ve been through
I’ve touched the sky
I’ve hit the wall
But I did what I had to
Ooooohhhh

On my way here
Where I am now
I’ve learned to fly
I have to want to leave the ground
I’ve fallen hard
But I’ve been loved
And in the end it all works out
My faith has conquered fear
On my way here.

Oh yeah yeaaah

My address has changed
Almost every year
I’ve found that standing still
Can quickly make a lifetime disappear
I’d rather try and fail
A thousand times denied
And this, whenever you feel pain
It lets you know that you’re alive

I’ve been a fool
I’ve been afraid
Yeah, I’ve been loved
I’ve been lied to
I’ve been wrong
And I’ve been right
I stood up when I had to

Yeah Yeahhhh

On my way here
Where I am now
I’ve learned to fly
I have to want to leave the ground
I’ve fallen hard
But I’ve been loved
And in the end it all works out
My faith has conquered fear
On my way here.

No guarantees
I believed that I would find
An open door or a light
To lead me to the other side
I guess that is why

On my way here
Where I am now
I’ve learned to fly
I have to want to leave the ground
I’ve fallen hard
But I’ve been loved
And in the end it all works out
My faith has conquered fear
On my way here

Yeahhhh
Oooooohh

A new year in my life has just started.  My birthday this year was the most memorable, so far.  I am used to having better celebrations before and after THE day itself.  However, this year is different.  I felt an outpouring of love left and right.  To top it all of, THE day, itself, was so much fun…and heart-warming. 

This probably has a lot to do with the two (2) major decisions I made for year 2008, one of which is to ensue right smacked in the middle of October (I have resigned from my very comfortable work effective October 16, am on leave since October 6, and will be starting working in a new organization on October 20). 

The other decision I made early this year.  This resulted to THE day being extra-extra special (Maraming salamat talaga).

Ca, Inay, Ate Rose, Migs, Kuya Nelson, and Achie: Thank you for exerting so much effort and creativity in showing how much you love me.  Mahal ko kayo. We’ll see each other around…

I am, indeed, happy na, birthday pa.  San ka pa?